i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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