Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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