Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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