This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
