How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
