Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize