She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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