there's paper in my vomit.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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