and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
