It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
