You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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