The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize