Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
