we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Randomize