my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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