Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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