chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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