The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
