Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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