k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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