and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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