I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize