Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
