that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
