what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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