oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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