my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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