good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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