Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
vagina is talking i cant
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
