We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
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