he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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