Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
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I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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