At least make sure they are 18
Why
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
