You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.