in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
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