Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It's blow job season.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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