It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
