I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
