honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
