At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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