he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
