Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
