Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize