Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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