dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
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