the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
