I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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