if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.