It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster