That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
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this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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