READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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