Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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