He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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